Belief Is Everything.

An oldy but goody... because the swallows are back yet again...

Belief is Everything. By Emily Osbun Bermes

We have a nest of swallows, this year, in our horse barn. I am fascinated by these birds that fly with more stealth and grace than even the Red Tail Hawks do. I’ve watched these swallows build the nest, and recently populate it with 5 babies.

I recently saw one of our barn cats in full pursuit behind one of the parent swallows who was flying not more than a foot off the ground. She chased the tiny bird at full speed around the back of the barn, and out of sight. I jumped up, in a vain attempt to save the bird I was sure was about to be cat chow. Not 10 seconds later, before my feet had even left the deck, I saw the return of the cat and the bird. To my surprise, the bird was not in the cats’ teeth, but rather chasing the cat so aggressively that the cat ran straight up onto the deck seeking shelter. Not what I anticipated!

Now, you and I both know that the cat could have eaten the bird; and we all know the bird couldn’t have put a dent in the cat (not a very big one anyway). But there are times in life when belief alone can defy the laws of nature, and practical wisdom. The swallow believed he could scare off the cat… and the cat bought it.

Confidence.
No matter who we are, at some point we will doubt ourselves; it’s impossible not to. As a personal coach I’ve worked with individuals who seemed to have it all, yet doubt, for them too, was inevitable. Its one of the common denominators for being human, it seems. And yet, when faced with a challenge, imagine the difference between taking it head-on with the confidence of a swallow with the audacity to attack a cat, or taking it on more like a canary; convinced of your own delicate nature.

People will respond differently to you; depending on which belief you choose to hold about yourself: I see it everyday. “We teach people how to treat us” I’ve heard said so many times; and I honestly believe few things more strongly. If we put ourselves out there with the expectation that we will be successful, respected, listened to, taken seriously… we most often will be. If we put ourselves out there guarded, unsure of who we are, believing we will be eaten alive… we will be. The beliefs we hold about ourselves impact how others treat us dramatically.


Arrogance.
An important distinction begs to be made, however, between confident conviction and utter arrogance. It is a subtle line that most people can spot….. in others. Self-assuredness is the confidence in knowing who you are, what your talents are, and knowing exactly when and how to use them- there is authenticity in confidence. There is very little fear, and a lot of clarity- like for our swallow friend. Arrogance as I see it, is more like a peacock. Insecure, in need of attention, and falsely advertised by a huge plume of deceptively long feathers… underneath it all, a peacock is essentially a turkey, and on some level, I think he knows it. If you are going to put your energy into anything… let it be authenticity and confidence… not plumage.