Structure

New habits are hard to sustain. Ask anyone who’s tried to create one! They are hard to sustain because much of what we do is unconscious. The moods we have, the ways we respond to stimuli, the things we do and don’t do are largely automatic or habitual. So how do we move our behaviors from the unconscious to the conscious so that we are more mindful of the choices we make? Structure.

A structure is simply something we set up, physically, to remind us of what we are choosing to do, or who we are choosing to be. Structures keep us conscious of our behaviors. A good structure is anything that marries the intended goal, habit, or behavior with the person who’d like to engage it. Structures can be simple, but should also be fun and fail-safe, so an ounce of creativity is helpful in creating them. Here are some examples I’ve seen ... use them as a springboard for creatively implementing your own structures to help remind you to meet your goals.

• For the person who forgets to pack (and therefore eat) their lunch: Make it the night before and place your car keys on top of the lunch (yes ... keys in the fridge) so that there is no way to leave without the lunch.

• For the person working at being calm throughout the day: An inspirational quote or expression taped to your computer (or dashboard, palm pilot, partners forehead) to remind you.

• For the person who forgets to run first thing in the morning: Place your running shoes and sweat suit out on the dresser to remind you that this is what you put on first, and why.

• For someone working on feeling good (hey, even that takes work sometimes): Send a championing email to yourself at night so that it is the first thing you read when you get to work.

As you can see, these simple ideas can go a long way in getting a person on track with their goals and habits, simply by raising their level of consciousness. The key here is keeping your structures simple, fun, and easy. So do what you can to avoid these pitfalls:

• Over-structured environments: If you have 87 structures in place at any given time, you’ll learn to ignore them all. The mind simply can’t process all of it, and will shut itself off as a result. Keep it simple.

• Change it up: If the same sticky note sits on your computer for more than a week, you’ll not notice it anymore. It just starts to blend into your normal environment. Novelty is key for visual stimuli, so keep it novel.

• Structure or abuse: I went into a woman’s house shortly after she had given birth, and she had pictures of anorexic supermodels all over her cupboard and refrigerator. I’ve had two kids ... so part of me gets it. Still, abusive is the word that came to my mind. Since it was not possible for her body to ever be that thin (let alone right after giving birth!), it was setting her up for failure and probably guilt, depression, and negative self-worth issues as well. Use structures to support, not self-sabotage.

Something to ponder: What habits or awareness of behavior would you like to incorporate into your life? What structure could support you in this process?